And they all lived happily ever after....

All right, I admit it!  I'm a royalist! I love all things royal, I bunked college on the Friday when Prince Charles visited Lockerbie, I waved at the Queen when she came to visit the memorial site in Lockerbie, when our Catherine was still a baby, and I said "Good morning!" to Princess Anne as she stepped off the royal train in Glasgow Central (we just happened to have got off the 8.15 Scotrail from Lockerbie) That really made my mum's day, as she loved the royals more than I do! So it's no surprise that today I made sure all remote controls were firmly in my grasp as Catherine Elizabeth Middleton walked down the aisle of Westminster Abbey with her father, Michael, and  walked back down on the arm of her new husband, Prince William of Wales.

Why was it so special?  For me, it's just that Kate is so ORDINARY! I don't mean that in a nasty sense - I mean that she is as down-to-earth as they come. Her father was an airline pilot, her mother a stewardess.  They run a party planning business. They're the average family next door. Okay, they probably aren't struggling to make ends meet, but they're by no means aristocracy. They work for their money. But in being working parents, they've raised three poised, well-mannered, well-educated and - let's face it - stunningly beautiful children.  Kate was just another undergraduate among hundreds at St Andrews when she caught Will's eye, and that's the whole charm of this story. It's every little girl's dream to be a princess one day. For Kate, or Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge as she's now titled, it's a dream come true.

The day
In our house, it was a good old English day. Rain outside, but inside, tea, scones, cream and jam.  I was joined by my dear friend Lady Petronella Dinky-Boom (come on, you've ALL seen the current Facebook game and even if you won't admit it, you've all worked out your name!), and we settled down to oooh, aaaah, and laugh hysterically at the weird fashions! In London, the mood looked festive and literally a sea of red, white and blue. The weather looked overcast but not raining.

The dresses
The little flower girls looked stunning in their ivory dresses with puffy sleeves and flower halos, but the star of the wedding party (next to the bride, of course) was the bridesmaid. Pippa Middleton looked drop-dead gorgeous in the simple, straight-cut, cowl-neck white dress she wore. I'm sure she's going to be on plenty more society party invites after today, and NOT just because of her famous in-laws! Kate's mother was dressed simply and elegantly in a soft grey which really suited her.  Camilla's outfit suited her well.  The Queen's was brighter than the sunshine, but another winner for me was the absolute understated elegance of the Prime Minister's wife, Samantha Cameron, in her stunning emerald green dress.

Simple and stylish

Elegant in Emerald

Fashion Funnies
Of course, there are always those that make you ask "What were you thinking?" I know this is where fashionistas will come after me with machetes, but what the heck. Victoria Beckham's dress was actually very pretty but that hat - slap bang in the middle of her forehead - made her look like a try-out for a new style Dr Who alien. Add to that the long ponytail and you have a cross between Star Wars and Stewardess Barbie. I spotted a sky blue crescent moon hat, also perched on front of the head. Another black hat had a saucer-like creation that sat on the one side of the head, and a huge black rose on the other, like the wearer had said "Hat...flower...hat...flower..oh what the heck, let's have both!" But the winner, hands down, has to go to young Beatrice York for a creation that looked like she'd come to Africa, caught some kind of buck and got someone to mount the horns on the hat for the big day!

The Force was strong with this one....

Were Kalahari animals harmed in the making of this hat?

The Bride
Every bride I know wants to look their very best on their wedding day, and they always use styles that flatter them. Kate was no exception. Everything was simple and understated. The make up was natural, the dress in a simple elegant style, the train long enough to be a train, but not so ostentatious that you needed a whole team of bridesmaids to handle it. She looked completely relaxed and poised walking up the aisle, and even her dashing groom, resplendent in the scarlet dress uniform of the Irish Guards, was blown away by her beauty.

The Wedding
This was not the usual long-winded royal occasion. They got straight to the vows after the first hymn; then a short sermon, second hymn, reading, third hymn, prayers (and LOTS of prayers for children - "heir and a spare" is traditional, Kate, just so you know...) and signing the register. And then the long walk down the aisle to the door. There is just something so incredibly emotional about any newlyweds emerging from a church. Probably the only part of the day where I almost lost it.Then the open-top carriage ride back to Buckingham Palace (imagine, girls, that the first thing you had to do after getting married was to go back to your mother-in-law's house....)

The Balcony Scene
It was the moment all of us in the house had been waiting for. Even Colin. Though in honesty, Colin wasn't worried at all about the obligatory kiss (of which us lucky commoners were treated to not one, but TWO!) - he was much more excited about the Lancaster, Hurricane and Spitfire flypast!

Did Colin cry at this point, maybe?

Final thoughts
As I watched today, I just got such a sense of the purity of it all, and everything seemed to accentuate it - the decor in the abbey, the flowers, the bridesmaid's dress, the bride's dress, even the kiss on the balcony. Then it dawned on me. The name "Catherine" means "pure" (you'd think I'd have got that right from the start, with my daughter having the same name...).  It certainly was prominent today.

I loved it. Brits just get pomp and ceremony. And yes, we moan about the taxpayers' money. And yes, we moan about all the hype. But face it - all us girls love a good love story, and we love weddings. I do wish them well. I wish them joy, long life and happiness together. True love won out today; this wasn't just Cinderella marrying her handsome prince - this was a 29 year old man and woman declaring before witnesses that they had found the one with whom they wanted to spend the rest of their lives. It's not a "for show" marriage. You only need to take one look at them to see they're best friends, first and foremost. They are a young couple who have solemnized their deep love for each other before God. Whatever the future of the British monarchy, I am an ardent supporter of matrimony and I want to echo one line of the ceremony - what God has joined together let no man (albeit another party, family interference, public scrutiny, or media frenzy) put asunder.

Say it with me, folks .... and they all lived happily ever after 

Dealing With a Speed Wobble

When Anthony, my youngest child and duracell bunny of note, was born, he looked, to all intents and purposes, 100% perfect.  His hearing test was superb, his reflexes were sharp, he certainly had no problems with his lungs, and all systems seemed to be functioning perfectly normally. Oh sure, he decided from day one that this breastfeeding thing is for the birds, and flat out refused, no matter what I tried (and trust me, I tried everything!) and then there was the issue of sleep, which he decided almost from the get-go was for sissies (I wonder who he gets that from .....).  But he was growing beautifully, passing all his milestones - in general doing just fine.

I returned to work, and I found a nursery school, where he would happily go for the next 6 1/2 years of his life.  But we started to notice something about his eyes.  They tracked from side to side, very quickly, and the more tired he was, the worse it got.  His daymother also noticed it and noticed that he didn't follow objects as well as other babies his age.  He was fine with the big colourful rattles, but smaller things, he didn't seem to follow.  She worried that Anthony was blind.  We made an appointment to see an eye specialist in the town, and she told us that he has a condition known as "nystagmus".  It is a condition in which nerve endings in the muscles of the eyes have died or not developed, resulting in an instability or involuntary movement of the eyes.  She gave us the prognosis that most people with a nystagmus learn their own coping mechanisms and will each "deal with it" in their own way.  She told us there and then that he may not read a book "square on" like his peers, but he'd find a comfortable way to read it.  I put this very comforting information in the back of my head.

What nystagmus looks like

Shortly after, I met a lady with a pronounced nystagmus.  She said that it had not held her back in any way at all.  That was what I needed to hear at that time.

And I really haven't given it too much thought since then.  Anthony completed preschool, and at the beginning of this year, started primary school.  And that's when the fun began ....

His teacher called me in within a week, and said that she had him right at the front, but that he still seemed to be battling to see, and that he would almost lie with his head on his work, and that in some tasks the class did, he needed almost double the time to complete it.  She requested that we revisit the ophthalmic surgeon.  Just before I did, something in my head said "What if it's not the vision? What if this is the nystagmus?"  The opthalmic surgeon said that his eyes are still the same strength they were.  Yes, he's far-sighted - exactly the same condition (and almost the same strength) that I have, but his eyes have not deteriorated at all.  He confirmed exactly what I'd been thinking.  He suggested I see a specialist who works in eye exercises.

So I did that this morning.  She did a couple of quick tests and said four words that would begin to change the way we view everything - "Yup, it's the nystagmus..."  She did a whole load of other tests, glasses on, glasses off, one lens covered, different positions in the room, different card charts, reading close up, reading far away.

And then she dropped the bombshell. "There is no exercise I can give you, there is nothing that can be done, there's no surgery that can correct this.  Your son is visually impaired. My advice would be to keep him in mainstream school for as long as you can, but my worry is that, certainly at high school level, he will battle to read textbooks.  You may need to research into alternative schools, or homeschooling as options".

I watch this little bundle of energy running around.  I watch him try to defeat the White Witch in Narnia on the PC.  I watch him cycling.  I see him on the stage every Sunday morning, giving all the musos a hard time.  I listen to him discussing Star Wars with my teenage son's youth leader.  I giggle inwardly, as I am introduced to yet another parent that he doesn't actually know either, but with whom he's struck up a conversation just before my arrival.  I sense his heart of generosity as he so desperately wants classmates to come around so "I can show them my stuff, and we can play".  And I can't reconcile this.  My child is not handicapped. And yet he is.

But as I said to someone today, I think sometimes God puts extra character, energy and stubbornness in certain people.  God knows the challenges that lie ahead of them.  I think I understand now why Anthony can go on so much less sleep than anyone else, and be fine.  How he can outstubborn even the most stubborn of people.  He will have to work twice as hard for twice as long to be just as good as everyone else.  I don't think there are many other kids that could handle this the way that Anthony will.  There's a level of gritty determination in him that is awe-inspiring. 

And when I see this, I know he's going to be all right.  One day, he's going to meet another lady whose baby has just been diagnosed with the same condition, and he's going to put her mind at ease, by saying, "Don't worry - my mom felt just like you, and look at me - I turned out just fine."

Some tips I found helpful in research:

Information for Parents of School Children with NystagmusThese guidelines should be used discreetly and with acknowledgment that each pupil is an individual whose sight will vary.
1. Encourage the student to explain his/her visual needs; however, continual and undue attention to these should be avoided.
2. Allow books/objects to be held close to the eyes, the head tilted and any other body posture adopted if this enhances vision.
3. Provide the pupil with his own book/worksheet. Sharing is impossible.
4. Enlarging material will often help, although good contrast may suffice.
5. Wall displays for reference should be placed at eye level and where the pupil can stand close to it (not above a filing cabinet or table for example).
6. Ask the pupil where he/she would prefer to sit. It is often facing and near to the board, they should not sit to one side. He/she should be offered positions close to demonstrations during activities.
7. Store visual aids so that the student has easy access and can use them when he/she judges that they will be helpful.
8. Allow the use of prescribed tinted glasses, cap, hat, or eyeshade to reduce the effects of glare.
9. Read aloud when writing on the board; describe diagrams.
10. Allow sufficient time to complete tasks and to examine materials/objects.
11. Good (though not necessarily bright) lighting is essential. The light should be behind the student and directed onto the object being viewed. Matte surfaces for walls, boards, and paper prevent light reflection and glare.
12. Use strong color contrast between letters/figures/lines and background. These should be well spaced.
13. To keep track of where the pupil is up to when reading, a piece of dark card may be used or he/she can track with a finger. Exercise books with matte paper, different colors, and line spacing should be made available.
14. In ball games, it may be difficult for the student to follow a fast moving ball if they have poor vision or strabismus (misaligned eyes). Congenital nystagmus alone might limit effectiveness in the outfield. 

(From the American Nystagmus Network, www.nystagmus.org)